A card with thirty signatures, a bottle, a voucher. Or a whole novel built from the stories their colleagues tell about them, delivered on their last day.
Retirement presents are usually collective and a little impersonal, because a leaving collection has to suit everybody who chipped in. The speech is where the real stories come out: the time they fixed the boiler with a teaspoon, the legendary Christmas party, the phrase everyone still uses.
A Novellum book puts those stories somewhere they will last. One person gathers a few memories from the team, writes them into the brief with the retiree's name, and picks a genre that fits them (comedy works well for a leaving do, adventure for someone about to go travelling). We write a whole novel with them as the hero, and nobody else ever receives it.
It costs from $2.99, which leaves most of a collection for the flowers, and it arrives on the day you choose. Print the PDF for the leaving do, or have it land in their inbox on their first morning of retirement.
This is how one of our books begins. The brief: Graham Pike, retiring after thirty-four years as a school caretaker in Leeds, has one afternoon to save his own farewell assembly (comedy and adventure). The hero is invented.
Graham Pike tightened the knot in his tie until the elastic complained. The tie did not improve but his hands had something to do, which steadied him more than the polished shoes or the practiced smile. Thirty-four years as caretaker at St. Bartholomew's Primary had taught him that ceremonies were built from a thousand small preparations. Today he was both participant and property, retiring after a lifetime of mislaid glue sticks and victorious policies on missing gym balls. Today the school would say thank you and he would say goodbye, and the tin bell above the stage would ring once for each year.
A real opening Novellum wrote for an example brief, quoted unedited. Your book starts from your brief, and you read its page one free before you pay.
| Short novel, about 30,000 words | $2.99 |
| Short novel with its narrated audiobook | $7.99 |
| Medium novel, about 60,000 words | $4.99 |
| Full novel, about 95,000 words | $6.99 |
| Bundle: three Medium books, one now and two codes to give later | $13.99 |
Prices in US dollars, the same everywhere. You pay only after you have read page one.
Yes. Collect a few memories by email, then one person writes them into the brief. Up to 2,000 characters fits a lot of stories.
Yes. Have the book sent to the organiser rather than as a gift, and read page one aloud. You can print the PDF for a keepsake copy.
Yes. Pick the date and it goes that day, early afternoon in the UK and South Africa, with your team's message on the card.
The Short novel is $2.99; the Medium, about 60,000 words, is $4.99. Prices are in US dollars and your card converts them.
Yes. It is written by AI for one reader and says so on its final page.
Questions? Write to us. Novellum books are written by AI, for one reader only.