He says he wants nothing, and he means it. Give him a novel where he is the hero, built from the hobby he takes far too seriously and the life you have made together.
Most husbands answer the Christmas question the same way: "I don't need anything." Then they open a gadget, say thanks, and put it in a drawer.
A Novellum book is the one thing he cannot already own. Tell us what he does all week, the hobby he could talk about for an hour, his favorite team or film, and the running joke in your house. Pick up to two genres (a thriller with a comic streak suits most men who claim to dislike fiction) and we write a whole novel with him as the hero.
It costs from $2.99, arrives by email on Christmas morning with your note, and you can add a narrated audiobook for his commute or the long drive to his mother's. If he is not a reader, the audiobook is the way in.
This is how one of our books begins. The brief: Marcus Reid, 45, a high school chemistry teacher in Austin, Texas, who takes his backyard smoker more seriously than anything else in life, has his secret brisket rub stolen on Christmas Eve, days before the neighborhood cook-off, and turns detective with his wife's help (thriller and comedy). The hero is invented.
Marcus Reid adjusted the thermometer probe with the solemnity of a man aligning a nuclear clock. The smoker lid hissed when he closed it and a ribbon of pecan smoke lifted into the sharp December air, smelling like caramel and promises. He stood in a flannel shirt and a Santa apron he refused to admit was ridiculous, one hand on the probe, the other cradling a mug of coffee that had gone cold but was being held for ritual more than warmth. At forty five he liked to think he brought the same careful patience to teaching stoichiometry as he did to maintaining an even two hundred and thirty five degrees inside the 1970s offset smoker in the corner of his backyard. Precise heat, careful timing and an instinct for when to spritz were, to Marcus, virtues and the rub on the brisket was scripture.
He had been working on that rub for fifteen years. It was the kind of thing you did not recipe-share freely. It had the right bite of paprika and coffee, the ghost of cayenne, a touch of brown sugar that caramelized without burning, and one secret ingredient that might also be a minor sin of omission when listing lab reagents in front of rowdy juniors. He kept the formula written in an old exercise notebook where his lesson plans lived. The notebook lived in his desk drawer under the grade books, under a photograph of him, his wife Carol and their daughter Maya, arms around each other and cheeks pink from a neighborhood Fourth of July. He kept it as close as a scientist keeps a standard.
A real opening Novellum wrote for an example brief, quoted unedited. Your book starts from your brief, and you read its page one free before you pay.
| Short novel, about 30,000 words | $2.99 |
| Short novel with its narrated audiobook | $7.99 |
| Medium novel, about 60,000 words | $4.99 |
| Full novel, about 95,000 words | $6.99 |
| Bundle: three Medium books, one now and two codes to give later | $13.99 |
Prices in US dollars, the same everywhere. You pay only after you have read page one.
Add the narrated audiobook and he can listen in the truck or the garage. Plenty of people who never read fiction will read a story about themselves.
Thriller, adventure and comedy are the most popular for husbands. A mystery suits the one who solves every crime show before the end.
Yes, by first name, and the book will treat them kindly. Keep to details you would be happy to see in print.
Choose December 25 at checkout. Cards go out at 13:00 UTC, 8 a.m. on the East Coast.
Yes. The Medium is about 60,000 words for $4.99, and the Full about 95,000 words for $6.99, the length of a paperback.
Yes. It is written by AI for one reader and says so on its final page.
Questions? Write to us. Novellum books are written by AI, for one reader only.